Dumb Lawsuits

Remember when you were in school and the teacher handed you back a test you thought you nailed and it had a big fat C written in blood red ink at the top? Remember that stinging feeling of pain and hate and aggravation that stuck in the pit of your stomach and those voices in your head telling you to kill the teacher in the parking lot with the very same red pain that brought you so much pain? Me too.

According to the Boston Globe, a student at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst sued the school because a professor gave him a C in political philosophy.

Can anyone guess what the young student does for a living? That’s right, he’s a paralegal! He’s learned the first law of being a lawyer: sue first, ask questions later.

He claims the grade violated his civil rights and caused “emotional distress,” according to the story. Yes, I’m sure that’s why Martin Luther King Jr. fought for civil rights all those years ago, so that black people and white people would each receive those scratch-n-sniff stickers of the banana that says, “This has appeal!”

The judge threw the suit out and the defendant announces he plans to appeal his case to a higher court. The court said they would accept it because they need a good laugh.